It's a funny sentiment to get, not least because Eren's actually really shit at making friends. (And thus greatly values the ones he has, does not let them go easy.) His general method is to go through enough terrible shit with someone until they end up with...something.]
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org I'm not mad at you
[Not at her, not anymore. He's got a lot of other things to be mad about, and the situation that had put them at arms had been a real shit one. It was only later that he was given enough context to understand that, to decide she'd been wronged by the CDC the same as the victims of the exercise had been. Though by then the damage had been done.
A few months of bigger problems helps to cool off.]
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org I was being an asshole. Forget it.
[She wasn't the only one being stubborn. He knows when to admit that, sometimes. (So yeah. Maybe they can try to be friends again. Or whatever they were before. Friends, or comrades, or...something.)]
I guess I am sort of surprised to hear that. You struck me as the type of person to hold a grudge.
FROM: serket.vriska@cdc.org
Hey........ can I tell you something? A8out that day. I was going to explain a lot sooner, 8ut I never really got a chance. Mostly 8ecause I was too pissed at you to 8other.
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org I didn't say I wasn't holding a grudge
[Just not against her, not anymore. Because the thing is, he is that type of person. But he's also particular about the grudges he holds. His focus is cast a lot wider than her. At the people who are really to blame for all this.
[What the CDC did to them on Ajna was both cruel and unusual. Most of the time he'd find it vindicating to hear that the people who had been killed had managed to steal something back, as small as it was. But they were stealing it from the wrong people.
He runs the conversation over again in his head. It was ages ago, but it had stuck with him. All of Ajna did.]
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org ok
[It doesn't come off as much, in response to all that text. But honestly, he appreciates her being straight with him. It isn't often that people make sure he gets the whole story. Even if it's taken months.
By way of a "thanks", and in some of his own odd measure of reassurance—]
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org it won't happen again.
[The CDC can't keep ordering people to take their comrades out and expect it to fly. Blackmail or not, they won't stand for it. Not a second time.]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
I know!
FROM: serket.vriska@cdc.org
Don't make this weird.
[ She's the one who made it weird... ]
FROM: serket.vriska@cdc.org
I guess I just wanted to say that stuff.
FROM: serket.vriska@cdc.org
8efore I fucked it all up, I thought of you as a friend. And I guess that hasn't really changed, at least for me.
FROM: serket.vriska@cdc.org
That was all I really had to say.
no subject
It's a funny sentiment to get, not least because Eren's actually really shit at making friends. (And thus greatly values the ones he has, does not let them go easy.) His general method is to go through enough terrible shit with someone until they end up with...something.]
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org
I'm not mad at you
[Not at her, not anymore. He's got a lot of other things to be mad about, and the situation that had put them at arms had been a real shit one. It was only later that he was given enough context to understand that, to decide she'd been wronged by the CDC the same as the victims of the exercise had been. Though by then the damage had been done.
A few months of bigger problems helps to cool off.]
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org
I was being an asshole. Forget it.
[She wasn't the only one being stubborn. He knows when to admit that, sometimes. (So yeah. Maybe they can try to be friends again. Or whatever they were before. Friends, or comrades, or...something.)]
no subject
Really?
FROM: serket.vriska@cdc.org
I guess I am sort of surprised to hear that. You struck me as the type of person to hold a grudge.
FROM: serket.vriska@cdc.org
Hey........ can I tell you something? A8out that day. I was going to explain a lot sooner, 8ut I never really got a chance. Mostly 8ecause I was too pissed at you to 8other.
no subject
I didn't say I wasn't holding a grudge
[Just not against her, not anymore. Because the thing is, he is that type of person. But he's also particular about the grudges he holds. His focus is cast a lot wider than her. At the people who are really to blame for all this.
Whoever they really are. As for the rest—]
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org
what
no subject
........
FROM: serket.vriska@cdc.org
Hahahaha. Ok, point taken. I guess I'm just glad you're not still mad at me.
FROM: serket.vriska@cdc.org
You know how when we met up, I seemed distracted?
FROM: serket.vriska@cdc.org
I mean, I don't know what it looked like to you. I can only guess.
FROM: serket.vriska@cdc.org
Did you ever hear a8out what happened to some of the people who completed that mission? That they started hallucin8ing?
no subject
He hadn't heard. (Mikasa, she hadn't—
had she?)]
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org
hallucinating?
[As if to be sure he got it right. He has to guess around her quirk sometimes.]
no subject
Yeah. I ended up hearing a8out it from another recruit 8efore it happened to me, so I don't think we were the only ones to go through it.
FROM: serket.vriska@cdc.org
I hallucin8ed a8out Noh-Varr for seventy-two str8 hours, Eren. Since I don't sleep I never got a 8r8k from it.
FROM: serket.vriska@cdc.org
When I met with you, I could see him! Sometimes just standing around and smiling. 8ut a lot of the things I experienced were his memories. Happy ones.
FROM: serket.vriska@cdc.org
It felt like a 8ig flashing sign in my face going "this is what you just ruined, you fuckup!"
FROM: serket.vriska@cdc.org
I always wanted to tell you that was why I was acting so jumpy. I wasn't trying to get out of our conversation or anything like that.
FROM: serket.vriska@cdc.org
8ut it's hard to focus when your dead 8est friend is standing next to you and only you can see him.
no subject
He runs the conversation over again in his head. It was ages ago, but it had stuck with him. All of Ajna did.]
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org
ok
[It doesn't come off as much, in response to all that text. But honestly, he appreciates her being straight with him. It isn't often that people make sure he gets the whole story. Even if it's taken months.
By way of a "thanks", and in some of his own odd measure of reassurance—]
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org
it won't happen again.
[The CDC can't keep ordering people to take their comrades out and expect it to fly. Blackmail or not, they won't stand for it. Not a second time.]