[For something that isn't supposed to be a lecture, it sure sounds like one.]
If you're telling me not to get angry you can give it up
[In the end "it" and "himself" are one and the same. At this point he can no sooner divorce his anger from himself than he can lose a limb. Maybe it'll be diminished for a short time, but it'll be back in full force before long. It's such a part of him, it's given him drive and purpose, and that's always been his greatest weapon. (He can't get rid of it, he just needs to learn to manage it. It's too late for anything else.) It's when he doesn't know where to focus it that he feels like he's choking on it.
Like right now. He isn't actually very mad at the instructors. But he's mad at the CDC for kidnapping and threatening people into this. At the bird things that had come and killed his comrades. At himself for failing to protect them. The CDC brass is too faceless, too far away to rail against. The harpies are dead.]
no subject
If you're telling me not to get angry you can give it up
[In the end "it" and "himself" are one and the same. At this point he can no sooner divorce his anger from himself than he can lose a limb. Maybe it'll be diminished for a short time, but it'll be back in full force before long. It's such a part of him, it's given him drive and purpose, and that's always been his greatest weapon. (He can't get rid of it, he just needs to learn to manage it. It's too late for anything else.) It's when he doesn't know where to focus it that he feels like he's choking on it.
Like right now. He isn't actually very mad at the instructors. But he's mad at the CDC for kidnapping and threatening people into this. At the bird things that had come and killed his comrades. At himself for failing to protect them. The CDC brass is too faceless, too far away to rail against. The harpies are dead.]
I'm not just going to ignore what's going on
no subject
Not telling you to. I just wanted you to be aware that it's a double-edged sword. You know?
That goes for everyone. I hate what's going on, but seeing people hurt I hate more. That includes you.
[ you don't always get to choose your comrades. and big boss has very intense feelings about his nakama. ]
You ever want to get something off your chest, come talk to me. People tell me I'm a good listener, if nothing else. Take care.