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[He folds his feet beneath him, drawn into a tense ball in the oversized chair. Not a great topic if she wants to settle him down, but she ought to know.]
Three KIA, besides Dagger.
[No one he'd known very well, though they'd shared a rover with April, briefly. Though—]
They transferred Sasha out.
[And Reiner. But fuck Reiner.]
Three KIA, besides Dagger.
[No one he'd known very well, though they'd shared a rover with April, briefly. Though—]
They transferred Sasha out.
[And Reiner. But fuck Reiner.]
[ Three KIAs isn't that bad, and Mikasa doesn't dwell on it since it's not anyone that know but. She'd seen that Sasha had been transferred and she greets the news with stony silence. It's better than the alternative; that she died in this desolate place again. (Like the rest of them probably would. Her mission freebie demanded that her and Eren remain on the same crew, though it isn't a request that would save either of them from danger.)
When it's apparent that Eren is done, she just offers a short nod—silent again. It settles this time, and they both return to the recesses of their thoughts; pointless things that Mikasa wouldn't bother saying out loud, futile thoughts and wishes that would serve no purpose in the cruel reality of their lives.
But the two of them had survived. It had been a long time they'd been employed by the CDC, faced with powers greater than the both of them combined, and they'd survived. Not entirely by a feat of skill, so perhaps they do have some bit of fortune on their side.
Then, her attention wanders once more to their surroundings, and she shifts in the oversized chair, leaning toward the side so that she can examine the mirrors and the worn, old and dusty supplies that sit at their base. It's all rather familiar. ]
This looks like a barber shop. [ She imagines at least, it's not like she'd frequented them.
The point is that it's startling human. Perhaps they'd landed on some strange earth. ]
When it's apparent that Eren is done, she just offers a short nod—silent again. It settles this time, and they both return to the recesses of their thoughts; pointless things that Mikasa wouldn't bother saying out loud, futile thoughts and wishes that would serve no purpose in the cruel reality of their lives.
But the two of them had survived. It had been a long time they'd been employed by the CDC, faced with powers greater than the both of them combined, and they'd survived. Not entirely by a feat of skill, so perhaps they do have some bit of fortune on their side.
Then, her attention wanders once more to their surroundings, and she shifts in the oversized chair, leaning toward the side so that she can examine the mirrors and the worn, old and dusty supplies that sit at their base. It's all rather familiar. ]
This looks like a barber shop. [ She imagines at least, it's not like she'd frequented them.
The point is that it's startling human. Perhaps they'd landed on some strange earth. ]
[How is that a normal question??? How is he supposed to answer that.]
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org
she wasn't all that different
[Compared to how she is now. They'd all changed, grown stronger, carried heavier burdens and suffered greater losses and seen more monstrous things. But if there's one thing he can (does) count on her for, it's to be steady, steadfast. (Even on night they'd met, though it had taken her some encouragement. Even if they'd both been strangers then.)]
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org
what do you want to know
[Some topics he'll talk about easier than others. But maybe it'll net her a better answer.]
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org
she wasn't all that different
[Compared to how she is now. They'd all changed, grown stronger, carried heavier burdens and suffered greater losses and seen more monstrous things. But if there's one thing he can (does) count on her for, it's to be steady, steadfast. (Even on night they'd met, though it had taken her some encouragement. Even if they'd both been strangers then.)]
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org
what do you want to know
[Some topics he'll talk about easier than others. But maybe it'll net her a better answer.]
[He's not alone in that. But.]
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org
so make use of it
you don't need someone telling you what you think is worth doing
[do...you...]
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org
so make use of it
you don't need someone telling you what you think is worth doing
[do...you...]
[You knew what you were getting into when you messaged him, Ino. (Does murdering kidnappers count as special...) He's gotten a lot of people asking him about Mikasa, lately, but he hasn't gotten any better at talking about her. Or himself, for that matter.]
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org
I guess.
[Helpful. Shiganshina was very dull, until it was gone. He'd considered it a cage, when he was young. Railed against the walls and dreamed of getting out. That does not mean he does not mourn it. So, before she can be exasperated by that non-answer—]
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org
we'd hang around the fields or the canals. sometimes we'd get to see the Corps come through the gate on expeditions.
[Heading out straight-backed and purposeful. Coming home bloody and quiet, with hollow eyes and fewer numbers.]
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org
usually it was just me and her. and Armin.
[Because none of them were really all that good at making friends, otherwise. (She woke him up and helped him finish his chores when he fucked off to nap in fields. Let him drag her off to watch the Corps come by. Bailed him out of a lot of fistfights. Watched quietly as Armin spun heretic stories about the world outside the walls.)]
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org
she only lived with us a year before the wall fell
[And that's about when they stopped being children and started being refugees. And then soldiers, two years after that.]
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org
I guess.
[Helpful. Shiganshina was very dull, until it was gone. He'd considered it a cage, when he was young. Railed against the walls and dreamed of getting out. That does not mean he does not mourn it. So, before she can be exasperated by that non-answer—]
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org
we'd hang around the fields or the canals. sometimes we'd get to see the Corps come through the gate on expeditions.
[Heading out straight-backed and purposeful. Coming home bloody and quiet, with hollow eyes and fewer numbers.]
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org
usually it was just me and her. and Armin.
[Because none of them were really all that good at making friends, otherwise. (She woke him up and helped him finish his chores when he fucked off to nap in fields. Let him drag her off to watch the Corps come by. Bailed him out of a lot of fistfights. Watched quietly as Armin spun heretic stories about the world outside the walls.)]
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org
she only lived with us a year before the wall fell
[And that's about when they stopped being children and started being refugees. And then soldiers, two years after that.]
[They'd survived. Because they had no other choice. (Because any choice that ended otherwise was unacceptable. Something he wouldn't allow.)
He'd leaned his arms against his knees to wait out the storm in his standard measure of unhappy attention. Doesn't pay the mundane surroundings much mind until she mentions it. It does look like one. Sort of. (So?)]
Are you gonna cut your hair?
[Why else point it out? (And maybe it says something that he asks—are you gonna—and doesn't tell—you should— They're worlds away from home, from the people they'd been, and Mikasa can grow her hair out if she wants to. They still rely on their gear, here. But not as exclusively.)
Nevermind that it's been more than a year since either of them has had a proper hair cut. Eren's too impatient to let his get too long (and too impatient to keep it too short.) But quick trims with sewing scissors only go so far.]
He'd leaned his arms against his knees to wait out the storm in his standard measure of unhappy attention. Doesn't pay the mundane surroundings much mind until she mentions it. It does look like one. Sort of. (So?)]
Are you gonna cut your hair?
[Why else point it out? (And maybe it says something that he asks—are you gonna—and doesn't tell—you should— They're worlds away from home, from the people they'd been, and Mikasa can grow her hair out if she wants to. They still rely on their gear, here. But not as exclusively.)
Nevermind that it's been more than a year since either of them has had a proper hair cut. Eren's too impatient to let his get too long (and too impatient to keep it too short.) But quick trims with sewing scissors only go so far.]
FROM: iwaizumi.hajime@cdc.org
You've been here awhile, right?
FROM: iwaizumi.hajime@cdc.org
Who are the Almina? Or what I guess.
[Since Amber wants to be less than helpful.]
You've been here awhile, right?
FROM: iwaizumi.hajime@cdc.org
Who are the Almina? Or what I guess.
[Since Amber wants to be less than helpful.]
[Funnily enough, Amber was there while he tried to question the Almina survivors. She'd been...marginally helpful, then. Sort of. Eren's not the best source of detailed or unbiased information, but he had been here to see what happened firsthand. So—]
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org
another ship like ours.
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org
a few days into the Ajna mission, we got a message from the CDC brass
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org
they were fighting back. the CDC stopped them. tied them up like animals and killed them
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org
we watched it happen
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org
another ship like ours.
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org
a few days into the Ajna mission, we got a message from the CDC brass
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org
they were fighting back. the CDC stopped them. tied them up like animals and killed them
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org
we watched it happen
Edited 2015-06-06 07:10 (UTC)
[ Yes, this is all very uplifting stuff. Maybe she should've known better than to bother Eren for light conversation. ]
FROM: yamanaka.ino@cdc.org
A year is still a pretty long time.
FROM: yamanaka.ino@cdc.org
So the three of you spent a lot of time together?
FROM: yamanaka.ino@cdc.org
A year is still a pretty long time.
FROM: yamanaka.ino@cdc.org
So the three of you spent a lot of time together?
[That....would go a ways in explaining why Amber had called them traitors, though the explanation's far more dire than he would've expected it to be.
A brief lull in communication, while he mulls it over and stores it away for later reference.]
FROM: iwaizumi.hajime@cdc.org
They really don't pull punches here do they?
FROM: iwaizumi.hajime@cdc.org
Some of them must have escaped though, if they're here.
FROM: iwaizumi.hajime@cdc.org
Or are the people who are here different from the Almina?
A brief lull in communication, while he mulls it over and stores it away for later reference.]
FROM: iwaizumi.hajime@cdc.org
They really don't pull punches here do they?
FROM: iwaizumi.hajime@cdc.org
Some of them must have escaped though, if they're here.
FROM: iwaizumi.hajime@cdc.org
Or are the people who are here different from the Almina?
[Shingekis. After a year of dealing with them, you'd think she'd learn.]
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org
armin's my best friend
[His only friend, for a long time. Mikasa is...Mikasa.]
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org
there wasn't much else to do
[They weren't shining examples of social graces, even back then. And he'd been impatient with the masses, the neighborhood kids who called Armin heretic and knocked his books to the ground, the lazy soldiers who guarded the walls and drank on duty.]
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org
armin's my best friend
[His only friend, for a long time. Mikasa is...Mikasa.]
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org
there wasn't much else to do
[They weren't shining examples of social graces, even back then. And he'd been impatient with the masses, the neighborhood kids who called Armin heretic and knocked his books to the ground, the lazy soldiers who guarded the walls and drank on duty.]
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org
they said they got thrown down here to rot
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org
that's not escape
[Begs the question of just what they're here for. Or how long they ought to wait before making their own way out.]
they said they got thrown down here to rot
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org
that's not escape
[Begs the question of just what they're here for. Or how long they ought to wait before making their own way out.]
FROM: yamanaka.ino@cdc.org
Yeah, I remember.
[ How long has it been since Armin was transferred? She still remembers him fondly. How close the three of them were, even if they never said as much. How jealous she was that they were together when she was alone, without Shikamaru and Chouji.
But she doesn't want to think about those kind of things. She should've known better, messaging Eren.
Okay. Specific questions. ]
FROM: yamanaka.ino@cdc.org
How did you meet Armin?
Yeah, I remember.
[ How long has it been since Armin was transferred? She still remembers him fondly. How close the three of them were, even if they never said as much. How jealous she was that they were together when she was alone, without Shikamaru and Chouji.
But she doesn't want to think about those kind of things. She should've known better, messaging Eren.
Okay. Specific questions. ]
FROM: yamanaka.ino@cdc.org
How did you meet Armin?
[It's been months, since Armin was consistently on the crew. Weeks since the last time he pinged in and out of the Neheda with his memory gone, again. It's an absence that rings louder every day. Eren and Mikasa are stronger together, but it's still an unbalanced thing, without Armin there to temper them. (He sorely misses him. Especially lately.)]
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org
he came by a lot. my dad was a doctor.
[Only one reason you come by a doctor all the time. Either you get sick a lot, or—]
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org
there were a lot of assholes around who'd call him heretic for what he believed in.
[Or you get your face punched in one too many times for talking about the world outside the walls. And one outcast to another, they'd hit it off, and Armin had earned a guard dog in the process.]
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org
he came by a lot. my dad was a doctor.
[Only one reason you come by a doctor all the time. Either you get sick a lot, or—]
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org
there were a lot of assholes around who'd call him heretic for what he believed in.
[Or you get your face punched in one too many times for talking about the world outside the walls. And one outcast to another, they'd hit it off, and Armin had earned a guard dog in the process.]
[A doctor. Wouldn't much know he'd grown up following his father on housecalls, given Eren's shit bedside manner. He never really took after his dad. (His mother, on the other hand—
Except, maybe, in this.)]
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org
that we can't live within the walls forever. that there's a world out there that's worth seeing.
[It's a mantra people got used to hearing from Eren time and time again. But he'd gotten that from Armin, first.]
Except, maybe, in this.)]
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org
that we can't live within the walls forever. that there's a world out there that's worth seeing.
[It's a mantra people got used to hearing from Eren time and time again. But he'd gotten that from Armin, first.]
[He'd always been right. Eren had never doubted that for very long.
(The universe is bigger and stranger than he could have ever imagined, and they are swallowed up in it. But he refuses to let any of them disappear.)]
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org
we've got our own world to fight for. we're going back there.
[All of them. For all they can't seem to hold onto Armin for more than a few days at a time. For all they have yet to make any progress at all against the CDC. For all people are convinced their contracts are going to claim their lives, that destroying the titans is impossible. For all they'd probably be better off giving up on their shitty titan-infested world and finding another to call home. He can't do that. They'll make it through this, and they'll wipe out the titans and see their own world for themselves.]
(The universe is bigger and stranger than he could have ever imagined, and they are swallowed up in it. But he refuses to let any of them disappear.)]
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org
we've got our own world to fight for. we're going back there.
[All of them. For all they can't seem to hold onto Armin for more than a few days at a time. For all they have yet to make any progress at all against the CDC. For all people are convinced their contracts are going to claim their lives, that destroying the titans is impossible. For all they'd probably be better off giving up on their shitty titan-infested world and finding another to call home. He can't do that. They'll make it through this, and they'll wipe out the titans and see their own world for themselves.]
[It's terrible, but that's how the world is. Cruel and beautiful in different measures. He cannot abandon it, or humanity, which he holds too close to his heart. He can't save them or finally see the world outside the walls by running away from it.
He could say a lot about offering his heart up to humanity, to fulfilling his dreams, to taking vengeance against the titans. But first.]
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org
don't you
He could say a lot about offering his heart up to humanity, to fulfilling his dreams, to taking vengeance against the titans. But first.]
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org
don't you
[It is simple, isn't it. So.]
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org
why wouldn't I want to go back
[He has no family waiting for him that the CDC did not snatch up with him or transfer away to some distant ship. No home left that was not taken and destroyed by the titans before the CDC had a chance to threaten it. An impossible enemy waiting and willing to wipe out everything he cares about.
(He isn't stupid. He knows why she might find it strange. And yet.)]
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org
I won't abandon humanity to the titans because it's easier to give up and run away
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org
why wouldn't I want to go back
[He has no family waiting for him that the CDC did not snatch up with him or transfer away to some distant ship. No home left that was not taken and destroyed by the titans before the CDC had a chance to threaten it. An impossible enemy waiting and willing to wipe out everything he cares about.
(He isn't stupid. He knows why she might find it strange. And yet.)]
FROM: jaeger.eren@cdc.org
I won't abandon humanity to the titans because it's easier to give up and run away
[ It sounds familiar, doesn't it? (What is it, exactly, with these stupid shounen idiots and their grand ideas about hope and determination that are both unbelievable—laughable, really—and incredible at the same time? Are they just so unbelievable that they become incredible?
Even Ino isn't immune—the answer is obvious in hindsight, of course. Anything else wouldn't suit him.) ]
FROM: yamanaka.ino@cdc.org
You know, you sound a lot like somebody I know from back home.
FROM: yamanaka.ino@cdc.org
He's a pretty big idiot too.
Even Ino isn't immune—the answer is obvious in hindsight, of course. Anything else wouldn't suit him.) ]
FROM: yamanaka.ino@cdc.org
You know, you sound a lot like somebody I know from back home.
FROM: yamanaka.ino@cdc.org
He's a pretty big idiot too.
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